Welcome to the Weekly Siren Test, AtmoLife’s hodgepodge of meteorological happenings helping you survive your Tuesday. Content may or may not be satire, and it is your responsibility to decipher that for yourself.

Dearest Wedges,

Almost a year has passed since our last passionate encounter, but not a day has gone by in which my mind has failed to envision our fervid reunion. I can picture it now. You and I in an open field running toward each other in slow motion just like in the movies. We collide in a joyful embrace as you pick me up and twirl me around in the air.

Despite the shear happiness I felt on that fateful spring day, my heart has gradually descended into a trough of loneliness. Over the summer I had several encounters with other storms that briefly showered me with joy, but all were short lived and could not cool my burning desire to be with you again. Then as fall and winter arrived, I could not avoid the persistent dark and cold feelings. The time grew ever longer since hearing from you, and my memory of us began to rope off. I was worried that you had left for good, but a few friends down south recently swear they saw you drop in their neighborhoods. While you have strayed far from our home on the prairie, these sightings give me hope that you will someday return.

I know about your destructive history, and I have heard the others warn that you could ruin me if I get to close, but I want you to know that I do not care. I love you, Wedges, and I miss you like crazy. There is nothing that will stop me from seeing you again until the death ridge do us part. Please come back to our open fields this spring.

Love Always,
AtmoLife

GROAN AREA FORECASTS

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In case you missed it, we made meteorology themed Valentine’s Day cards! They’re a perfect last minute gift for that special meteorologist in your life.

This lunar eclipse really should’ve been called the loner eclipse for all the people watching it by themselves on Valentine’s Day.

Oklahoma had some pretty widespread wildfires on Sunday, but got torched much worse during Kevin Durant’s return the night before.

“Lake Oroville Spillway” is an anagram for “is vape really wool kill”. Stay woke.

METEOROLOGY THEMED VALENTINE’S DAY GIFT POWER RANKINGS

1. Big box of derechocolates
2. Stuffed Teddy Bearcage
3. Bouquet of Pacific firehoses
4. Couplets massage
5. Romantic lightning-lit dinner
6. Singing area forecast discussion gram
7. Necco Sweatindexhearts

HYPE PREDICTION OF THE WEEK

This week’s hype forecast stems from AtmoLife wxtwitter 100 meteorologist Gary Szatkowski, but Gary is not the one doing the hyping. A couple days before last Thursday’s snowghazi, Gary tweeted out lower & upper scenario snowfall forecasts.

This is really nice method of conveying the uncertainty of the storm track, which depending on the positioning, had the potential to produce a whole lotta snow or a whole lotta rain for South Jersey. The issue here is in the retweet disparity between the two forecasts. At least 11 people felt compelled to share the  HYPE TRAIN scenario without acknowledging that they could just as easily get jack shit.

From hindsight, we now know that freezing surface temps lingered well north until the late hours of the morning, leaving snowfall totals much closer to the zero case scenario. So for everyone who only retweeted the max case, SHAME.

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As we’ve mentioned in previous weeks, If you see someone post an absurd weather forecast on twitter/facebook/wherever, please bring it to my attention because this is a section dedicated to poking fun at when people who produce such forecasts. If I use the ridiculously hyped forecast that you have pointed out to me, I’ll be sure to credit you and award your school with an AtmoCup bonus point!

ATMOLIFE MS PAINT FORECAST

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WEEKLY INSTAGRAM CONTEST

Each week, AtmoLife asks our followers to post a challenge response photo/video to Instagram and tag our Instagram account (atmolife) in it.

Last week’s challenge: Tag AtmoLife in a photo/video of “lightening”

Here is last week’s winner:

Thank you to everyone who participated, and congrats to jasonmwx of Oklahoma for “capturing” thunder with your lightening. You win a free AtmoLife koozie and 3 AtmoCup points for your school!

This week’s challenge: Tag AtmoLife in a photo/video of you celebrating spring a little too early.

Here is our example:

The winning responder will again earn a free AtmoLife koozie and 3 AtmoCup points for their school. We’ll announce the winner in next week’s Siren Test, so be sure to submit your Instagram posts by 12Z Tuesday!

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